Patiently Waiting

It just hit me. I am indeed waiting. For something. I am not sure. It seems like it’s for an answer. To a question only half-formed. One thing’s for sure though. This mind, this thinking mind will not rest until I find that answer. I will not force it. Like most things in life. It will come. It will just happen. One lazy evening like this one. Unbidden. Out of the blue. Like most things in life.

Some people hate surprises. I used to be one of them. I’m big on planning. It’s almost second nature. But life is bigger. It doesn’t revolve around me. I am but a tiny spec. Wanting to leave an imprint. Yet wanting the comfort of insignificance. An insignificant imprint that will be significant to those who will bother to take a closer look.

Meanwhile, like an elusive fly caught inside my car, that half-formed question bugs me, but soothes me like the rising sun. Assures me that I am still here. Alive. Living my life. It brings me a sense of comfort. That mystifies me. Brings me back yet again to that ever reccurring puzzle in my mind…why…?

I take pause. Allowed the question to linger in me. Straight to my heart. My soul. Time is a friend. And I will bask. In this frustrating yet cleansing struggle. One day at a time. The answer will come. One day…